Friday, 20 February 2009

Curiouser and curiouser...

Having an affair seems to have opened me up to lots of strange behaviors I didn't even know I had in me.

First, I have developed a slight obsession with New York Deli sandwiches from Marks. Honestly. I used to hate the combination of pickle, meat and mustard, now I'm salivating at the thought. Other new found food-loves - Almond-stuffed olives, and rusks (a lady at the gym has a new baby, and I occasionally sneak one when she's not looking). Greek food? Stealing from children? Very out-of-character.

Secondly, a few bizarre crushes I never knew I harbored are coming out of the woodwork (not literally, can you imagine Gordon Ramsey climbing out of your bureau?) The most bizarre of which is none other than Alan Rickman, awkward ex-Truly Madly Deeply hearthrob, and dark wizard extraordinaire. I was avidly researching him on IMDB, when I found this frankly rather disturbing film called 'Closet Land' that he starred in 1991. It's about a writer that gets imprisoned in this abstract interrogation room. Rickman plays her interrogator, in various forms.

It's actually phenomenally tense. And quite hot. If you're remotely into power games, I suggest you look it up.

The other bizarre crush is on Simon Amstell. The first reason for it being bizarre is that he's about half my age. The second reason for it being bizarre is that he is 100% gay, a nancy-boy, camp as a row of tents. But he's got the most amazing sense of humor...

...I wonder what Freud would say.

Probably "Zee crush on zis homozexual male suggests zat you need a partner zat is more attentive, perhaps more zenzitive, and vill tend to you in a more traditionally feminine way, wiz more care and affection."

But what did he know?


Georgeous said...

Over many years of snatched trysts in hotels where neither of us wanted to waste time getting dressed for dinner I've become adept at the 'bedroom picnic'.
Every partner has their own preference. Pineapple, in chunks not rings; raw vegetables and dips; smoked salmon nibbles; gherkins have all been requested at some stage or another.
Maltesers are popular too as a dessert.
Actually the maltesers are my dessert, her foreplay ;-)

Serial Mistress said...

My god, a woman after my own heart, Alan Rickman is such a hottie :) Not so sure about Simon though, but I see part of it. My new guilty crush is a comedian - Jason Manford - and of course the original silver fox (now Dancing on Ice is back), Phillip Schofield! :)