Thursday, 7 January 2010

Snow is bad for my marriage

My garden looks like a postcard.

Inside, I am seething.

Hubby and I have been stuck in the house for the last three days and he is really starting to grate on me. You would have thought that a few days alone with the love of my life would be bliss. And I guess it would have been, if Hubby had not contracted a severe case of Man Flu.

The man has become Caesar-like, barking demands from his chair in the living room, from where he sits in his smelly bathrobe, watching reruns of ER. Every sentence is punctuated with a groan. He has a cold, and yet his appearnace suggests he is dying from some as-yet-unknown superbug.

This sketch from Man Stroke Woman seems to articulate my predicament pretty well...



Like a good wife, I have been running around, picking up his snotty tissues and pretending to sympathise with his hypochondria, but I have had enough. I am now upstairs, listening to Annie Lennox, and have told him to look after himself. After all, my bastard employers are insiting that I work from home.

Anyone else stuck? I hope not. Being housebound is a bugger.


xxxx

9 comments:

Leah said...

Yes, I was stuck for two days as well Shelly. My husband has also had man-flu and keeps sighing so hard that the noise he's making sounds like "phoo". It's all I can hear! AND like you, I've retreated to the bedroom to listen to music.

You have my sympathy girl!

XOXO Wifey said...

Oh Michelle Baby that's just waaaaay tooooooo funny!

Lucky for me my darling husband has managed to ge tinto work just fine as have I but I have to say that in any case we do get on just fine when together - apart from the lack of sex that is..

XOXO as always,

Wifey

rampant rabbit lover said...

I have been on holiday this week, all my darling hubby has been saying, the tiling wont be done in the bathroom this week then, snowed in, but he has gone to work thank god, off to see a new lover tomorrow so no snow or ice is going to stop me going.
just smile and relax to the music.
katex

The world according to Gaz said...

I don't won't to make light of your situation but we are expecting a top temperature of 41 deg C by Monday.

The world according to Gaz said...

Doesn't sound like fun at all. You probably don't want to know that we are expecting a top temperature of 41 on Monday
Have a great day

Leah said...

Thanks for cheering us up Gaz!

Case said...

I'm not stuck because there is no snow here. But I wanted to leave a cheery comment to sympathize with your plight: all that snow you poor devils have over there, all those used tissues laying about, and all that hypochondria! But all I can come up with is the cliche "snow is like sex: you never know how many inches you're going to get or how long it'll last."

Keep the faith. Snow goes, eventually. Sex doesn't have to.

Smitten said...

Greetings from Ireland, I can so relate to all of this.

Lovegenie said...

Shelly-

I have just gotten up to speed with your blog and can so relate. I just celebrated a year in my affair. The holidays ARE very diffifult and I am glad to be off my hiatus. Looking forward to more posts from you as you haven't in a while!