Tuesday 8 June 2010

The Norm.

It's days like today I remember why I cheated in the first place.

It has been nearly two months since James and I broke things off. My married life has settled into it's old, clunky pace again. I work. I go home. I get a kiss on the cheek. I cook. I go to bed. I wake up. I work.

Hubby and I sat curled up in front of the box last night, wrapped up in each other's limbs, my head snuggled into his breast bone. The woman I am today doesn't recognise the woman she was three months ago; sexy, in control, full of electricity. Today she is tired and hopeless, and even the familiarity of her true love's chest fails to envoke anything other than the same images of marital monotony. Like a mirror facing a mirror.

I need my fix. I'm logging on tonight.

8 comments:

Anonymous said...

I completely understand your last sentence. Several times in the past I have tried to give up all my extramarital activity - and I sometimes succeeded for up to six months - but in the end I kept being drawn back to my need to feel sexy, alive, wanted and wanting. Good luck!

Jim said...

Hey, at least you got your spouse to cuddle with you a bit. Mine won't sit anywhere near me . . . checking e-mail all night and falling asleep on the couch after I've gone up to bed are much higher priorities.

XO

Aphrodite said...

I read your post and thought I was reading my own thoughts!

Anonymous said...

Somehow we always end up being the person who we really are.

betty kiss said...

A past affair revealed a side of me that I never realised existed, a side that my spouse absolutely refuses to acknowledge. But hiding that part of me feels like shutting up part of my soul so I have no choice but to look elsewhere, or watch myself slowly curl up and die.

Anonymous said...

understand you honey xx

MC said...

Good for you, Shelly. I hope you find something delicious, soon, and without too much trouble.

Miss Naughty said...

I hear ya sister...lol
no seriously once you pop you cant stop... sorry cant help with the bad jokes...

i felt like that last night, it took me 10 mins before i logged in and commenced looking.


lucy
http://talesfroma30somethingx.blogspot.com/