I just got some time away from work to read the responses of a few regular readers, and am just letting you know I'm taking a little break from the blog. I'm finding it a bit tough to read lot of stuff saying I'm lying about who I am, and have changed. Like I said in my previous post, I realise the original post I wrote was a bit harsh, and I thought I'd responding to your queries as best I could. Sadly, this is obviously not the case, so I'm going to take some time out.
Michelle.
Monday, 17 January 2011
Monday, 10 January 2011
In response to previous posters...
Have read all responses to my last post, here's my response.
First of all, thanks for reading and responding. It saddens me to think that any regular followers are feeling a disconnection from me, so I hope that I can begin to clear things up here.
Not, at any point, have I said having an affair was a good idea, or the 'nice' option. Cheating for me has now become the only way for me to keep things ticking over. This is of course sad. I don't expect it to work for everyone, in every situation, but my marriage as improved all round, and that is non-negotiable. I am not kidding myself that I will not be found out - I take every precaution I can in my everyday life, but I am not a fool, nor am I "naiive". As any regular readers will know, I have struggled with my decisions before now. It's not like I just upped and decided to go shag someone else. I stewed for 9 years.
I really resent the suggestion that my husband has become an 'ignorable' part of my life. Considering I see my lover maximum twice a month, contacting him a few times a week - and the fact that I decided mutually to end my previous relationship for fear that it would enshadow my marriage - this is far from the truth. I love my husband, and we spend the majority of our time together. This blog was intended for me to document my extramarital experiences, and to vent my feelings of frustration and loss, but please do not allow that to make you think that is all I feel for my husband.
In truth, I adore him. I hate that I can't use his name right now. He is kind and funny and well-read and empathic and incredibly grounded and, believe it or not, still very very attractive to me. I want and need to share my body with him, but he makes it clear to me that he is not interested physically.
In response to Matt, I really don't know how I would feel if I discovered he was cheating, simply because no one ever really knows. I think my first decision would be to sit down and talk about it. I can't imagine that it would feel anything other than horrible, though I believe my experiences up until now would help me to understand his reasoning a little better. To empathise more. In short, I care about him, and if he made a decision to start seeing someone behind my back, I would just want to listen to his reasons for doing so. I was cheated on before in the past, both in long-term relationships, and so can see this as the only appropriate response. Listen and try to understand.
I do appreciate that I am, by talking about my personal situation on national television, encouraging this kind of criticism, so, in hindsight, I realise my initial bloggetary response was a tad ridiculous. I think calling it a "tantrum" is surely exaggerated - I've just read it back and, though I'm angry, none of the points I make are vitriolic or badly-argued. Everyone, including me, has to remember that one never reads or interprets neutrally - our own beliefs and experiences penetrate until nothing is objective.
Just to clarify, I do not work for IE, though I do have quite a close relationship with Rosie, as she's been very supportive on a personal level since the blog was brought to her attention. I was not paid to go on This Morning, but Ro suggested it and I agreed. I was also wearing a wig in the show, and had my voice disguised. I haven't done any radio, so don't know where that came from.
First of all, thanks for reading and responding. It saddens me to think that any regular followers are feeling a disconnection from me, so I hope that I can begin to clear things up here.
Not, at any point, have I said having an affair was a good idea, or the 'nice' option. Cheating for me has now become the only way for me to keep things ticking over. This is of course sad. I don't expect it to work for everyone, in every situation, but my marriage as improved all round, and that is non-negotiable. I am not kidding myself that I will not be found out - I take every precaution I can in my everyday life, but I am not a fool, nor am I "naiive". As any regular readers will know, I have struggled with my decisions before now. It's not like I just upped and decided to go shag someone else. I stewed for 9 years.
I really resent the suggestion that my husband has become an 'ignorable' part of my life. Considering I see my lover maximum twice a month, contacting him a few times a week - and the fact that I decided mutually to end my previous relationship for fear that it would enshadow my marriage - this is far from the truth. I love my husband, and we spend the majority of our time together. This blog was intended for me to document my extramarital experiences, and to vent my feelings of frustration and loss, but please do not allow that to make you think that is all I feel for my husband.
In truth, I adore him. I hate that I can't use his name right now. He is kind and funny and well-read and empathic and incredibly grounded and, believe it or not, still very very attractive to me. I want and need to share my body with him, but he makes it clear to me that he is not interested physically.
In response to Matt, I really don't know how I would feel if I discovered he was cheating, simply because no one ever really knows. I think my first decision would be to sit down and talk about it. I can't imagine that it would feel anything other than horrible, though I believe my experiences up until now would help me to understand his reasoning a little better. To empathise more. In short, I care about him, and if he made a decision to start seeing someone behind my back, I would just want to listen to his reasons for doing so. I was cheated on before in the past, both in long-term relationships, and so can see this as the only appropriate response. Listen and try to understand.
I do appreciate that I am, by talking about my personal situation on national television, encouraging this kind of criticism, so, in hindsight, I realise my initial bloggetary response was a tad ridiculous. I think calling it a "tantrum" is surely exaggerated - I've just read it back and, though I'm angry, none of the points I make are vitriolic or badly-argued. Everyone, including me, has to remember that one never reads or interprets neutrally - our own beliefs and experiences penetrate until nothing is objective.
Just to clarify, I do not work for IE, though I do have quite a close relationship with Rosie, as she's been very supportive on a personal level since the blog was brought to her attention. I was not paid to go on This Morning, but Ro suggested it and I agreed. I was also wearing a wig in the show, and had my voice disguised. I haven't done any radio, so don't know where that came from.
Friday, 7 January 2011
Pissed off
Mia just sent me this.
http://www.mumsnet.com/Talk/relationships/1118625-Illicit-Encounters-your-thoughts
I was originally going to join this forum and respond to some of the acerbic comments that the posters had left, but it is Friday afternoon and I'm already wearing my lazy weekend hat. So, my reply is going here.
Bear in mind, first, that many of the ladies using Mumsnet are mums, with very strong ideas of what it means to be a family. I certainly do not expect them all to agree with what I'm doing...
...But. People's lack of understanding and empathy is a constant shock to me. Fundamentally, no one can prescribe a solution for anyone else's situation. Even if that person is, like me, married for 10 years, under-sexed and overworked, this does not mean their experiences and feelings reflect mine. Some people's marriages are rehabilitated by therapy. Some are helped by books. And a small percentage are helped by one partner's decision to take a lover.
I'm afraid this is inarguable. These women and men with their blanket solutions may speculate about the effects of my affair, but if any of them knew me or my husband, they would find themselves uncomfortably back-tracking. Yes, I have to tell lies, and yes, that is not ideal. But when is anything 'ideal'? There is less resentment, there is less tension, and we are both happier. Frankly, after years of openly trying to reach this point with open honest discussion and professional help, I am just relieved things are okay finally.
I am in no way suggesting that having an affair is the solution to the majority of marital problems. But to suggest that discussion, out-and-out honesty and professional intervention are the solutions to all marital problems is just as ridiculous. I personally believe in the ethics of responsibility, rather than the idea that doing the socially-accepted 'good thing' in all situation is always the most beneficial option. My marriage is better because I have a lover. Go figure.
http://www.mumsnet.com/Talk/relationships/1118625-Illicit-Encounters-your-thoughts
I was originally going to join this forum and respond to some of the acerbic comments that the posters had left, but it is Friday afternoon and I'm already wearing my lazy weekend hat. So, my reply is going here.
Bear in mind, first, that many of the ladies using Mumsnet are mums, with very strong ideas of what it means to be a family. I certainly do not expect them all to agree with what I'm doing...
...But. People's lack of understanding and empathy is a constant shock to me. Fundamentally, no one can prescribe a solution for anyone else's situation. Even if that person is, like me, married for 10 years, under-sexed and overworked, this does not mean their experiences and feelings reflect mine. Some people's marriages are rehabilitated by therapy. Some are helped by books. And a small percentage are helped by one partner's decision to take a lover.
I'm afraid this is inarguable. These women and men with their blanket solutions may speculate about the effects of my affair, but if any of them knew me or my husband, they would find themselves uncomfortably back-tracking. Yes, I have to tell lies, and yes, that is not ideal. But when is anything 'ideal'? There is less resentment, there is less tension, and we are both happier. Frankly, after years of openly trying to reach this point with open honest discussion and professional help, I am just relieved things are okay finally.
I am in no way suggesting that having an affair is the solution to the majority of marital problems. But to suggest that discussion, out-and-out honesty and professional intervention are the solutions to all marital problems is just as ridiculous. I personally believe in the ethics of responsibility, rather than the idea that doing the socially-accepted 'good thing' in all situation is always the most beneficial option. My marriage is better because I have a lover. Go figure.
Wednesday, 5 January 2011
This Morning
Frankly, this was terrifying, and I sort of wish I'd had longer to talk, but I think I did okay. Phew.
(And I got their autographs ;))
http://thismorning.itv.com/thismorning/life/affairs-keep-my-marriage-alive
I can't actually believe I did this.
xx
(And I got their autographs ;))
http://thismorning.itv.com/thismorning/life/affairs-keep-my-marriage-alive
I can't actually believe I did this.
xx
Thursday, 23 December 2010
Merry Christmas
And all that guff! I've finally finished shopping...just. Missing the Doctor already. We had a brief tryst early this week, but he had a few meetings and we were constantly on the go. Worth it, if just for the stolen kisses...
Anyway - this is just a quick post to say thank you to all of you for following me, and best of luck for 2011. Let's hope my new year will be as thrilling as this one has been!
Much love,
Michelle xx
Anyway - this is just a quick post to say thank you to all of you for following me, and best of luck for 2011. Let's hope my new year will be as thrilling as this one has been!
Much love,
Michelle xx
Wednesday, 22 December 2010
When did
Christmas get this insane? Seriously. It feels like yesterday it was December 1st and I was writing my little lists for everyone, and now it's the 22nd and I've got nothing done except put up a tree and drink my body-weight in mulled wine (M&S have launched an offensive against my liver by putting this stuff on offer). Am currently planning move-for-move shopping trip for this evening. Am not including time for breathing or eating. Will scour shops like some kind of consumer ninja.
I remember a time when I was a child and snow meant no school and near-fatal accidents trying to ice skate on our garden pond. Today, snow means 'how the fuck am I going to get to Debenhams?'. How romantic.
I am swimming in accounts. Only 2 days til time off. Counting. The. Minutes.
I remember a time when I was a child and snow meant no school and near-fatal accidents trying to ice skate on our garden pond. Today, snow means 'how the fuck am I going to get to Debenhams?'. How romantic.
I am swimming in accounts. Only 2 days til time off. Counting. The. Minutes.
Thursday, 2 December 2010
Radio Ga Ga
So...I was on BBC5live this morning, talking about my extramarital relationship, and BoredWivesClub.com. I wasn't expecting to be put on the spot - stupidly I guessed that the presenters would find my online confessional to be 'just a bit of fun'.
To me, however, it was obvious that the female presenter, Shelagh, had serious preconceived ideas about my situation, and was barely able to conceal her contempt. She also exercised no empathy to try and understand why I, and thousands of women like me, might need a platform like BWC, rather suggesting that I simply didn't have any friends. She insinuated, sniped and tutted her way through the conversation as if I was an idiot harpie who simply need to have a friendly chat with Hubby.
Thankfully, Nicky Campbell was a bit more professional, and refreshingly up front. Why is it always the women who have such a huge problem with me? Anyway - I'm on 1.26 in...have a listen for yourselves and see what you think!
http://www.bbc.co.uk/programmes/b00w7bl7
xxx
To me, however, it was obvious that the female presenter, Shelagh, had serious preconceived ideas about my situation, and was barely able to conceal her contempt. She also exercised no empathy to try and understand why I, and thousands of women like me, might need a platform like BWC, rather suggesting that I simply didn't have any friends. She insinuated, sniped and tutted her way through the conversation as if I was an idiot harpie who simply need to have a friendly chat with Hubby.
Thankfully, Nicky Campbell was a bit more professional, and refreshingly up front. Why is it always the women who have such a huge problem with me? Anyway - I'm on 1.26 in...have a listen for yourselves and see what you think!
http://www.bbc.co.uk/programmes/b00w7bl7
xxx
Tuesday, 16 November 2010
100th post! 100th post!
100th post! Ooooh! I feel like I should have some kind of party or something. But I am at my desk and swamped in papers and if I do a little dance it's all going to fall on the floor and my boss will look at me funny. So...maybe I'll just celebrate in my head.
The magazine have confirmed that my piece is going to be out on the 25th. It's in Love It! magazine on the 25th of this month. I'm proper excited! I've had the photos through from the agency and they've successfully managed to disguise me without making me look like a survivor from some scientific testing lab. Or an ex-prostitute.
Things have slowed back into their usual lull. Doctor and I meet weekly at the moment, though I'm slightly running out of reasons to take sporadic evenings off ("Pilates" is exhausted...the physique is not helping me lie). My friendship with The Intern is actually wonderful. It's been such a long time since I've been friends with a bloke, it's stellar. We objectify women on mass. We eat crisps with our mouths open. I have sort of taken up smoking again, casually, just so we can hang out by the fire exit and complain about our boss.
I'm sure everyone in our office thinks it's weird that I'm so chummy with a 23 year old , acne-ridden graduate. I don't care. We are bound by our shared misathropy, like teenage goths. I council him about his missus. He councils me about how, despite the obvious beneifts and undeniable selfishness, maintaining an affair is actually quite difficult. I'm sure he judges me, but thankfully he does it really quietly so I don't have to think about it.
In other news, I went to a lady-only comedy night last week with friends, and it made me LOL a lot. I very rarely see good female comedians on TV so I was kind of shcoked that 4 really ace, rather unfamous ones were tearing it up on a Thursday at my local. One lady was Korean and reminded me of Margaret Cho. Which was good. Because Margaret Cho is amazing. Observe:
I am still celebrating in my head...
The magazine have confirmed that my piece is going to be out on the 25th. It's in Love It! magazine on the 25th of this month. I'm proper excited! I've had the photos through from the agency and they've successfully managed to disguise me without making me look like a survivor from some scientific testing lab. Or an ex-prostitute.
Things have slowed back into their usual lull. Doctor and I meet weekly at the moment, though I'm slightly running out of reasons to take sporadic evenings off ("Pilates" is exhausted...the physique is not helping me lie). My friendship with The Intern is actually wonderful. It's been such a long time since I've been friends with a bloke, it's stellar. We objectify women on mass. We eat crisps with our mouths open. I have sort of taken up smoking again, casually, just so we can hang out by the fire exit and complain about our boss.
I'm sure everyone in our office thinks it's weird that I'm so chummy with a 23 year old , acne-ridden graduate. I don't care. We are bound by our shared misathropy, like teenage goths. I council him about his missus. He councils me about how, despite the obvious beneifts and undeniable selfishness, maintaining an affair is actually quite difficult. I'm sure he judges me, but thankfully he does it really quietly so I don't have to think about it.
In other news, I went to a lady-only comedy night last week with friends, and it made me LOL a lot. I very rarely see good female comedians on TV so I was kind of shcoked that 4 really ace, rather unfamous ones were tearing it up on a Thursday at my local. One lady was Korean and reminded me of Margaret Cho. Which was good. Because Margaret Cho is amazing. Observe:
I am still celebrating in my head...
Wednesday, 10 November 2010
P.S
I know I have been shitty shit shit about posting. Soon I promise. But I'm filing right now and I don't have a hand free. And even if I did I'd probably only be able to type this...
mnbfsndmfsm bcdkfnd vsliflsalmncsjxz
Awful.
mnbfsndmfsm bcdkfnd vsliflsalmncsjxz
Awful.
Excited
So so so so so...I am going to be appearing in a magazine. Talking about my affair. And Bored Wives Club. Isn't that jolly?
They haven't finalised the date with me yet but I will totally let you know when I know. Syked!
xx
They haven't finalised the date with me yet but I will totally let you know when I know. Syked!
xx
Thursday, 4 November 2010
Michelle Sutton : Professional Adulterer
It as if the last few days grew a big mouth with teeth and ate me up whole.
The last 4 days have been rid.ic.u.lous. So ridiculous that the only way I can articulate it is to punctuate it like that. 2 dates in the less than a week with the Doctor. The despertate caused by him being on nights whelled up into some kind of lust-filled baloon slowly expanding in my chest.
I tell you one thing. My bottom draw of battery-operated friends has never had such a workout.
Anyway. On Sunday evening, I fobbed the hubster (do you like it? I think it'll catch on) off with a Mia-related excuse and escaped for a few hours in the early evening. The Doctor had a meeting on Monday so he checked into his holiday a day early and we ordered obscene amounts of room service and frollicked like randy rabbits. As a result, I'm not sure if I'll be abe to afford Christmas. I do not care. IT WAS THAT GOOD.
Then, on Monday evening, after all the nodding and scheduling and important conversations, my medicine man met me at a bar and we snuck away to have dinner on the river. Blissful. Blissful and drunken.
I then rolled home on Monday evening to cuddle up with the lawful one and eat TV dinner like a pro. Specially like a pro who's just spent the last two days decieving her sweet but uninspiring husband that she is 'out with the girls' while meeting up with a handsome medicial professional to have two consecutive sessions of mind-blowing How's Your Father.*
* Loose use of 'professional'. I am not actually paid to do this stuff. **
** If anyone would like to pay me, I'm open to offers.
The last 4 days have been rid.ic.u.lous. So ridiculous that the only way I can articulate it is to punctuate it like that. 2 dates in the less than a week with the Doctor. The despertate caused by him being on nights whelled up into some kind of lust-filled baloon slowly expanding in my chest.
I tell you one thing. My bottom draw of battery-operated friends has never had such a workout.
Anyway. On Sunday evening, I fobbed the hubster (do you like it? I think it'll catch on) off with a Mia-related excuse and escaped for a few hours in the early evening. The Doctor had a meeting on Monday so he checked into his holiday a day early and we ordered obscene amounts of room service and frollicked like randy rabbits. As a result, I'm not sure if I'll be abe to afford Christmas. I do not care. IT WAS THAT GOOD.
Then, on Monday evening, after all the nodding and scheduling and important conversations, my medicine man met me at a bar and we snuck away to have dinner on the river. Blissful. Blissful and drunken.
I then rolled home on Monday evening to cuddle up with the lawful one and eat TV dinner like a pro. Specially like a pro who's just spent the last two days decieving her sweet but uninspiring husband that she is 'out with the girls' while meeting up with a handsome medicial professional to have two consecutive sessions of mind-blowing How's Your Father.*
* Loose use of 'professional'. I am not actually paid to do this stuff. **
** If anyone would like to pay me, I'm open to offers.
Monday, 25 October 2010
I love
this kind of weather. Really crisp and cold and not a cloud in the sky. My boss informs me that tomorrow it will be pissing it down. What a killjoy.
The Doctor has been somewhat out of touch...even though I know his night shifts have ended. Don't want to machine-gun text as I know desperation isn't exactly sexy. And it's not as if he doesn't reply when I do contact him. He just doesn't initiate. I feel like, if I didn't poke him, he'd never poke me.
Anyway, rather than biting the rest of my nails off (read: I have already done this), I am getting my head down applying for new jobs. I need a change. This office is a reminder of how stale my life has gotten.
In other news, BWC got 19,000 hits last month. Woot!
xx
The Doctor has been somewhat out of touch...even though I know his night shifts have ended. Don't want to machine-gun text as I know desperation isn't exactly sexy. And it's not as if he doesn't reply when I do contact him. He just doesn't initiate. I feel like, if I didn't poke him, he'd never poke me.
Anyway, rather than biting the rest of my nails off (read: I have already done this), I am getting my head down applying for new jobs. I need a change. This office is a reminder of how stale my life has gotten.
In other news, BWC got 19,000 hits last month. Woot!
xx
Wednesday, 6 October 2010
Friday, 1 October 2010
The Intern
as it turns out, is actually rather sweet. Last night both of us pulled a late one in the office (older readers will know that late nights spent in the office with interns have previously ended in a rather unsavory, Post-Its-in-unfortunately-places fashion) and ended up have quite a deep 'n' meaningful about marriage and commitment.
Thankfully, said intern is lacking rippling muscles/knee-weakening smile/sufficient ability to groom himself to elicit my affections. Good job too. Any more men in my life and I'd have to start timetabling them.
Anyway, over hobnobs and a sneaky Stella we sat waxing relationships until about 10pm. Intern, the poor lad, is under increasing pressure from his ladyfriend to ditch his student digs and move in with her. This may be because of three reasons :
1) She actually has a genuine interest in moving in with the boy and starting an 'adult relationship' (*sigh*)
2) It's been a year, and she feels that moving in is 'just what you do'.
3) Girlfriend no longer wants to spend her days precariously navigating plates of 5-day old lasagne and XBox controllers, and would quite like to cuddle up to him in a place that doesn't smell like someone left a cabbage behind a radiator.
This got me thinking. When I was 23 (*looks wistfully off to the left in remembrance of cheap wine and legwarmers*), I idolised those friends of mine who were in Committed Relationships. And although I had no actual evidence that one would've made me happier than I was (shagging around with various friends of friends and generally having a rather good time both above and below the waist), I was a bit brainwashed. Cosmo said I was getting on. Time to make a move. Find a man, pin him down and play house.
I eventually did when I met Hubby, though luckily I think he's the closest I've ever and will come to 'The One' (not that I think there's only 1. There are probably 15). But I fear for girls like Intern's missus. It's shit being a young woman. The messages are so confusing.
Intern told me the sex wasn't very good.
I gave him some lengthy advice, which in hindsight equated to, "Get out now. Your penis will thank me later." Life's too short to be stuck in a sexless relationship...
...Yeah yeah...what would I know?
Thankfully, said intern is lacking rippling muscles/knee-weakening smile/sufficient ability to groom himself to elicit my affections. Good job too. Any more men in my life and I'd have to start timetabling them.
Anyway, over hobnobs and a sneaky Stella we sat waxing relationships until about 10pm. Intern, the poor lad, is under increasing pressure from his ladyfriend to ditch his student digs and move in with her. This may be because of three reasons :
1) She actually has a genuine interest in moving in with the boy and starting an 'adult relationship' (*sigh*)
2) It's been a year, and she feels that moving in is 'just what you do'.
3) Girlfriend no longer wants to spend her days precariously navigating plates of 5-day old lasagne and XBox controllers, and would quite like to cuddle up to him in a place that doesn't smell like someone left a cabbage behind a radiator.
This got me thinking. When I was 23 (*looks wistfully off to the left in remembrance of cheap wine and legwarmers*), I idolised those friends of mine who were in Committed Relationships. And although I had no actual evidence that one would've made me happier than I was (shagging around with various friends of friends and generally having a rather good time both above and below the waist), I was a bit brainwashed. Cosmo said I was getting on. Time to make a move. Find a man, pin him down and play house.
I eventually did when I met Hubby, though luckily I think he's the closest I've ever and will come to 'The One' (not that I think there's only 1. There are probably 15). But I fear for girls like Intern's missus. It's shit being a young woman. The messages are so confusing.
Intern told me the sex wasn't very good.
I gave him some lengthy advice, which in hindsight equated to, "Get out now. Your penis will thank me later." Life's too short to be stuck in a sexless relationship...
...Yeah yeah...what would I know?
Wednesday, 29 September 2010
Extramarital dating site Ashley Madison
http://www.thisislondon.co.uk/lifestyle/article-23883083-current-affairs-why-cheating-is-better-than-divorce.do
Gross. Just....gross. I'd never heard of this site before but, judging by the dubious headline, "Life's Too Short, Have An Affair", CEO Noel Biderman sounds like he has about as much understanding and empathy for cheating spouses as Nick Griffin has for victims of racial hate-crimes. The site is launching in the UK, and every bit of press I read makes me want to break something.
Okay...maybe that's a bit strong. But he does look and sound like The World's Biggest Douchebag. I quote;
"We tried to advertise during the Superbowl but the NFL said, 'No, we're not going to allow this ad'. This is the NFL, whose players are arrested for sexual assault, for drunk driving and attempted murder. They're going to be the bastion of morality for America? That's ridiculous."
You can't SELL infidelity moron. Why would you wish to impose an idea like 'How's about shagging around?' on a stadium of unsuspecting football fans? Completely inappropriate. Affairs are something to be conducted in private, not a commodity to be advertised at huge public events. And advertising them is ridiculous anyway - as if the decision to have one could be equated with the decision to buy a new television.
As a cheater myself, and one that uses a different dating site, I just think this guy has got it all wrong. By all means create a platform for extramarital liaisons - I have such a platform to thank for transforming my life over the last two years - but don't shove it in people's faces...and don't say that 200,000 Londoners should be using it by Christmas, because they probably shouldn't. What a brash, Americanised method of promotion.
Rant over. ;)
Gross. Just....gross. I'd never heard of this site before but, judging by the dubious headline, "Life's Too Short, Have An Affair", CEO Noel Biderman sounds like he has about as much understanding and empathy for cheating spouses as Nick Griffin has for victims of racial hate-crimes. The site is launching in the UK, and every bit of press I read makes me want to break something.
Okay...maybe that's a bit strong. But he does look and sound like The World's Biggest Douchebag. I quote;
"We tried to advertise during the Superbowl but the NFL said, 'No, we're not going to allow this ad'. This is the NFL, whose players are arrested for sexual assault, for drunk driving and attempted murder. They're going to be the bastion of morality for America? That's ridiculous."
You can't SELL infidelity moron. Why would you wish to impose an idea like 'How's about shagging around?' on a stadium of unsuspecting football fans? Completely inappropriate. Affairs are something to be conducted in private, not a commodity to be advertised at huge public events. And advertising them is ridiculous anyway - as if the decision to have one could be equated with the decision to buy a new television.
As a cheater myself, and one that uses a different dating site, I just think this guy has got it all wrong. By all means create a platform for extramarital liaisons - I have such a platform to thank for transforming my life over the last two years - but don't shove it in people's faces...and don't say that 200,000 Londoners should be using it by Christmas, because they probably shouldn't. What a brash, Americanised method of promotion.
Rant over. ;)
Monday, 27 September 2010
The second wave...
I'm sure some of my long-term readers (hello there, guys!) may remember when I first started having my affair. The effect it had on my marital sex life was...bizzarre. Suddenly, after years of paying me about as much attention as one would a potted plant in student accomodation, he was all over me like an aggressive rash.
As things are picking up again with my secret life, my marriage is following suit. This morning, Hubby woke me up with breakfast in bed (it was 6.30am and I've got to admit I wasn't immediately thrilled...I just wanted to damage something), and then proceeded to initiate sex. INITIATE. I nearly passed out from shock. Nearly.
For context, Hubby and I have sex less than once every two months, and it is, without fail, me who makes the first move. This change of spots is both unnerving and very, very welcome. I've never stopped fancying him; though his charms are a little worn, he is still the man I fell in love all those years ago. Just with a bit more podge and a bit less hair.
His new found interest in my naughty bits couldn't be better timed; The Doctor is on a month of nights so can't see me at all for the next few weeks. I just pray that it lasts!
x
As things are picking up again with my secret life, my marriage is following suit. This morning, Hubby woke me up with breakfast in bed (it was 6.30am and I've got to admit I wasn't immediately thrilled...I just wanted to damage something), and then proceeded to initiate sex. INITIATE. I nearly passed out from shock. Nearly.
For context, Hubby and I have sex less than once every two months, and it is, without fail, me who makes the first move. This change of spots is both unnerving and very, very welcome. I've never stopped fancying him; though his charms are a little worn, he is still the man I fell in love all those years ago. Just with a bit more podge and a bit less hair.
His new found interest in my naughty bits couldn't be better timed; The Doctor is on a month of nights so can't see me at all for the next few weeks. I just pray that it lasts!
x
Monday, 20 September 2010
Stoked.
The evolution of BoredWivesClub in this last week has filled me with an overwhelming urge to wield the Upper Crust baguette on my desk like a microphone and bellow Michael Jackson's 'You Are Not Alone' into it. Seriously. So many inspiring/appalling stories! Exactly what myself and the girls were hoping for.
In other news….
DATE TONIGHT DATE TONIGHT DATE TONIGHT
Mondays are less suspicious right? Only middle-aged people do exciting things on Mondays. Though I'd hate to think my idea of excitement is middle-aged. This evening, supermarket champagne, a cheap hotel room, and some very expensive underwear.
Right now I am staring at various Excel sheets hoping they will evaporate into thin (virtual) air. Sadly nothing has happened yet, except that I got a bit teary because I was squinting and our new intern asked me if I was okay.
Sadly, he's not a patch on New Boy. Thank Christ I've got the Stethoscope Stud to keep me company or I could've found myself inexplicably attracted to said intern. His 'beard' consists of 16 single hairs and he smells a bit like a football locker. Oh dear.
In other news….
DATE TONIGHT DATE TONIGHT DATE TONIGHT
Mondays are less suspicious right? Only middle-aged people do exciting things on Mondays. Though I'd hate to think my idea of excitement is middle-aged. This evening, supermarket champagne, a cheap hotel room, and some very expensive underwear.
Right now I am staring at various Excel sheets hoping they will evaporate into thin (virtual) air. Sadly nothing has happened yet, except that I got a bit teary because I was squinting and our new intern asked me if I was okay.
Sadly, he's not a patch on New Boy. Thank Christ I've got the Stethoscope Stud to keep me company or I could've found myself inexplicably attracted to said intern. His 'beard' consists of 16 single hairs and he smells a bit like a football locker. Oh dear.
Friday, 10 September 2010
A little project...
So, after having kept this blog for GOD KNOWS how long, I have had something rather interesting brewing under my hat (clumsy mashed simile) for the last month. Now, as we're nearly ready to launch, I think it's time to tell you guys about it.
It's a website, and it's called The Bored Wives Club. My friend Mia and I came up with the idea way way way while bitching about our respective partners over coffee. She is still to this day one of the only people who knows about my extramarital dalliances. Anyway, we were lamenting the fact that, as professional women with overly-secure houses, we rarely get the chance to natter to our female neighbors about our partners' ineptitudes over the garden fence...despite the fact that both of us have enough grievances to fill a 800-page novel.
Long story short, I suggested we start a blog that gives women a space to rant about their marital lives. For about a year, nothing really happened, but then Mia met Rose, a designer, at a conference a while back, and casually mentioned our little brainchild...
Well. 4 months later, the three of us have given birth to the BWC. The site isn't live yet, but it will be very very soon. I'm sooooooo excited, and will be forwarding it to all my friends this weekend to get some stuff on there. Will post a link ASAP babies.
Joy! xx
It's a website, and it's called The Bored Wives Club. My friend Mia and I came up with the idea way way way while bitching about our respective partners over coffee. She is still to this day one of the only people who knows about my extramarital dalliances. Anyway, we were lamenting the fact that, as professional women with overly-secure houses, we rarely get the chance to natter to our female neighbors about our partners' ineptitudes over the garden fence...despite the fact that both of us have enough grievances to fill a 800-page novel.
Long story short, I suggested we start a blog that gives women a space to rant about their marital lives. For about a year, nothing really happened, but then Mia met Rose, a designer, at a conference a while back, and casually mentioned our little brainchild...
Well. 4 months later, the three of us have given birth to the BWC. The site isn't live yet, but it will be very very soon. I'm sooooooo excited, and will be forwarding it to all my friends this weekend to get some stuff on there. Will post a link ASAP babies.
Joy! xx
Monday, 6 September 2010
My music loving best friend...
is such a darling. Every week I get these bizzarre indie gems piling up in my work inbox. And when I can sneak out the headphones on my lunchbreak I sometimes allow myself a little boogie at my desk. This week, a tasteful Toto cover. Now there are two words I never thought I'd type in the same sentence....
What? Yes, they had some great songs. But they also had cheap sounding synthesizers and incredibly bad hair. And as far as I can, this band have neither of those things. Ace!
xxx
What? Yes, they had some great songs. But they also had cheap sounding synthesizers and incredibly bad hair. And as far as I can, this band have neither of those things. Ace!
xxx
Friday, 3 September 2010
Pooped.
Thursday. Was. Exhausting.
In a good way, natch. The Doctor (or Stethoscope Stud, as I have now taken to calling him) met me straight after work. I had done a sort of rom com-worthy trasnformation from Work Shelly to Super-Vamp Adulteress Michelle, using the staff bathrooms at work as a kind of Mr Ben-esque closet. Except of course when I opened the door out to my office I hadn't been magically transported to a zoo. And I wasn't been voiced-over by Terry Wogan. Which, in context, would have been more than a little distracting.
Anyway; we met just around the corner from my office. Doctor wore a crisp suit that looked so expensive I was a bit wary of touching him (don't worry...I definitely got over that). We had a quick coffee and then raced off to our hotel suite for what can only be described as onlythebestsexIhaveeverhadinmylifeever. Hubby was elsewhere occupied with friends for the evening, meaning I didn't have to be so strict with my curfew. We stayed rolling around in our own filth for about 4 hours, before I had to make a shift exit (via the shower and some strategic clothing-adjustment) at 11pm. FOUR HOURS. I do not know the last time I stayed awake and in bed for that long...let alone in bed with a living human male. I was so giddy on leaving that I forgot to put one of my stockings on and really unnerved a junior porter who got in the same lift as me. He just kept staring agressively at my right leg, as if to say 'How dare you brazenly disregard the basic rules of getting dressed? What are you, some kind of fingerless invalid?'. I just coughed uncomfortably and got out a floor early.
It is just over a week later and I fear I'm still walking like a benched footballer.
In a good way, natch. The Doctor (or Stethoscope Stud, as I have now taken to calling him) met me straight after work. I had done a sort of rom com-worthy trasnformation from Work Shelly to Super-Vamp Adulteress Michelle, using the staff bathrooms at work as a kind of Mr Ben-esque closet. Except of course when I opened the door out to my office I hadn't been magically transported to a zoo. And I wasn't been voiced-over by Terry Wogan. Which, in context, would have been more than a little distracting.
Anyway; we met just around the corner from my office. Doctor wore a crisp suit that looked so expensive I was a bit wary of touching him (don't worry...I definitely got over that). We had a quick coffee and then raced off to our hotel suite for what can only be described as onlythebestsexIhaveeverhadinmylifeever. Hubby was elsewhere occupied with friends for the evening, meaning I didn't have to be so strict with my curfew. We stayed rolling around in our own filth for about 4 hours, before I had to make a shift exit (via the shower and some strategic clothing-adjustment) at 11pm. FOUR HOURS. I do not know the last time I stayed awake and in bed for that long...let alone in bed with a living human male. I was so giddy on leaving that I forgot to put one of my stockings on and really unnerved a junior porter who got in the same lift as me. He just kept staring agressively at my right leg, as if to say 'How dare you brazenly disregard the basic rules of getting dressed? What are you, some kind of fingerless invalid?'. I just coughed uncomfortably and got out a floor early.
It is just over a week later and I fear I'm still walking like a benched footballer.
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